Merry Christmas

 

I hope your holidays are unforgettable! Thank all for your support.

Rape and it's stigma

borrowed picture

Sorry guys, I have been away for sometime. This story am posting just cut my attention and I beg to deviate from the series I started some days ago to make this post.

An 18yrs old rape victim, whose identity is withheld has committed sucide in the Amarata area of Yenogoa Local Government Area of Bayelsa State, Nigeria. The deceased, a native of Oduali community in Abus/Odua Local Government Area of Rivers state, was allegedly raped by three unindentified boys in the area.
The victim reportedly took her life due to the stigmatization she experienced and the pain she felt after the incident.
A family source confirmed that the victim was gang raped at gunpoint while on an errand for for her elder sister. She was said to have been forced into an uncompleted building by her assailants, who were three in number. She was able to identify one of the offenders who was traced back to his home but discovered he had absconded.

Unknowned to her guardians, the distraughted girl had decided to take her life. She drank a poisonous substance that killed her. It was further gathered that she left a sucide note before taking her life.

What kind of  punishement should be melted out to perpetrators to eradicated this monstrous act?
 Victims should realise that its not their fault and taking their life is allowing the offender to go free. Please give your thoughts on this.

Before the rings- Episode 1 (Giving)

There so many meanings of giving but I would use a simple dictionary meaning: Giving is handing out properties, gifts, time, money, fulfilling promises by voluntary transfer without receiving value in return.
What is the disposition of your intending spouse to giving? What does he/she give? How often does he/she give? How much of all his/her giving do you get in terms of time, money, gifts and so on.
 Please, do not misinterpret this to mean he/she must be "Santa Claus". Am not also saying that falling for someone is dependant on how much they can give you, or how well they lavish gifts on you but during the period of courtship if he/she is not the giving type it's not going to change after the "rings" have been exchanged.

This is one score you have to sit, discuss and reach a compromise on rather than assume and play the " love is blind" song. Also take into consideration that once a man or woman does not have enough to always share but has a generous mind and attitude with a bright prospect for the future you can team up to build an endearing and prosperous marriage.

Fact is A person who cannot share or give from the little they have will not share or give when he/she has enough. This is isn't only money but also gifts, time, emotions, encouragement, vision and everything else that is meant to be shared in a relationship.
Question: Are you a giver or always the receiver?  keep your comments rolling in.

Before the ring series

Dear readers, I would like us to treat a very important topic which will run in series.

As we all know, marriage is not a destination, but a life  long journey involving two parties. It is a covenant relationship and that is why when a woman or man give themselves into marriage without adequate covenant protection, they become vulnerable.

It is obvious that love cannot be absent when talking about marriage and its associates; courting and dating. It will be beneficial to address this subject of love via a popular phrase that says "Love is blind". We do know that love covers a multitude of defects but it is not advisable that one anticipating marriage should walk into it blindly.

In this series we would be looking at Nine topics namely; Giving, Chastity, Principles, Company, Previous relationships, Compatibilities, Health Compatibilities, Prejudice and Miscellaneous.

This is going to be so much fun to talk about and hear your different views and opinions. Please join in!

A minute silence for a Legend

 The death of Nelson Mandela  was announced by the South African Government on Thursday 5th of December. He is a Legend that changed the History of SA.
Rest in peace, Madiba!

Mistreatment of a widow in Nigeria

Plight of widowhood

Dear readers, I want us to look at the plight of widows in the world today. Widows are one of the most vulnerable in any society, they are exposed to indiscriminate abuses in all aspects of their lives, they bear scars of stigmatisation in the society whose sensibility has been lost to a jaded conscience.

Widows are faced with grief, sadness, loneliness, hopelessness, brokenness, confusion, pressure and being overwhelmed. In some countries widows are seen as outcasts or killers of their husband and their own misfortunes. Apart from the pain of losing her husband, she contends with the task of caring for her children alone without help from extended families or the society.

In most African countries these women are seen as the spanner in the wheel of fortune of their in-laws. Though they may be legally entitled to their late husbands estate, traditional practices kick in to take over all that has been left for the widow and her children to survive. They become destitute and every possession claimed by the deceased siblings or family. Sometimes they are made to go through barbaric traditional practises where their hair is shaved off and made to sleep with the corpse in the same room for days. She will be subjected to various rituals to determine whether or not she is responsible for her husbands death.

In some cases a young widow can be obliged to become the wife of her former husband's elder or younger brother and forced to have sexual relations with him. She's meant to mourn her husband for some months during which she's not allowed to wear clothes of colour, use beauty products or wear jewellery.

Question; What can be done to change or eradicate widows plight and stigmatization? please send in your contributions and suggestions.

Virtuous woman

The book of proverbs 31 from verse 10 asks the question " who can find a virtuous woman? For her price if far above rubies". The woman described in that book is a selfless woman , who is relevant today as when that book was written. This woman cooks, cleans, takes care of her home and children plus she has her husbands  faith and confidence. She runs her household with great stewardship making sure that she gets the finest for her household.

A virtuous woman has high moral standard, she holds her tongue, choosing to speak kindly and with wisdom. The welfare of her home and family are her priority.

Question: are you a virtuous woman?

 Please send in your thoughts and suggestions, let the discussion begin!

Topics and issues

Dear readers! Am still so new to this and trying to figure out the website. Be kind to register and send in your contributions, topics and issues you would like us to talk about. Also be free to ask questions as well as give answers when you have one.
 The first topic for discussion is a virtuous woman. Am looking forward to your comments.

Welcome note

Hi everyone! This blog is set to mold and shape women around. It is devoted to trashing issues facing every woman in our world today. Topics on marriages, relationships, sex, careers, prayers, finances and a host of other issues will be discussed here.
Constructive criticizing as well as opinions, advice , suggestions and solutions will be welcomed. Please join me to make this a comfort home for women.
Thanks!
Love, Elo